Thursday, August 8, 2013

The Step-Parent Trap

In case you don't know this about me I have two pseudo step-kids, a 15 year old "step-son" and 8 year old "step-daughter". And my step-daughter may have just seen me naked. In fact I am pretty sure she DID SEE ME NAKED!!!!!

Before I continue my tale there are a few things more you should know about me.
  1. When the pseudo step-kids are not here I have no problem walking around naked or in my underwear. I am completely comfortable that way. (I know TMI but you need to know). When they are here I am always covered appropriately. 
  2. I am always trying to get The BF not to bother me while in the shower (he likes to to talk to me then).
  3. We have an opaque shower curtain...its not clear but you can see through it.
  4. And the "pseudo" step-daughter has a purple hippo that is filled with lavender scented rice that she likes to heat up and cuddle with when she isn't feeling well...right now she has a cold.
Tonight as I was taking a shower, someone politely knocked on the bathroom door, I thought oh my gosh finally The BF is knocking before walking into the bathroom. When I responded to the knock the "pseudo" step-daughter walked into the bathroom and decided to ask me how to heat up her hippo in the microwave. We had a brief exchange and she left. 

In the mean time I was freaking out. Despite being comfortable being naked I am completely freaked out by this incident.

During the exchange I just keep thinking OMG I am naked and I know she can see me.

I briefly thought about yelling at her to get out but I didn't want to upset her, she just wanted her hippo to cuddle.  To her I wasn't a naked woman, I was the mom like person who could help her who just happened to be in the shower when she needed help.  

The Ex-Wife/Friend has assured me she does it all the time to her and I know that when you are mom you are never left alone but there is a fine line when you are a step-parent, "pseudo" or not. I am always aware of that line but I don't want the kids to be nervous in their home or worried they cant talk to me about things. And when you live with people, especially kids, doors will be opened and conversations will occur with only an opaque sheet of plastic between you. But what is okay?

Obviously this was not intended naked and I will be locking the bathroom door from this moment forward but what is okay with "pseudo" step-kids? Did I handle the situation okay? Should I have talked to her about it or just move on?

She appears to be okay and I don't think it really occurred to her I didn't have any clothes and all worries don't really matter. But I do worry that I am doing it all right.

Welcome to being a step-parent.


  1. I think no worries. Some people are just comfortable that way. But in the future for your comfort I'd lock the door ;-)

  2. I think you handled it well. You have talked to her mom who has assured you that all is well. I think you should view this as a complement. She has treated you exactly as she would her own mom. That is an awesome thing that many step-parents never experience.

    In the future I would lock the door though :-)


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