But last night she wanted me to come and visit her. Is she serious? That's like asking Jamie Lee Curtis to celebrate Halloween. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!!!! I am not doing it. And for a very simple reason....I am terrified of mice. And she has a mouse in her apartment. They are disgusting, flea carrying, germ filled creatures that should be killed on sight.
Is this fear irrational? Yes. Do I realise that its irrational? Yes. Do I care? No. There are a few stories that you need to know to understand why my mother is being mean to me.
True Story #1....Lets go back to when I am 11-12 years old. At the time my family was living in this dingy basement apartment. On day I walked into the bathroom to get a hairbrush, when I opened the drawer a mouse leaped out and clung to my sweater. Causing me to scream and jump around until the mouse "let go" of my sweater and run under a pile of dirty clothes. Now looking back I know that the mouse did not cling to my sweaters so much as got stuck in the intricate pattern and the mouse was as traumatised as I was by the whole experience but I don't care. I believe that not only did this start my irrational fear of mice it also contributes to my intense aversion to doing laundry.
True Story #2...I am now in my mid to late 20s. I am living by myself. All my roommates have moved out to get married taking their cats with them. I am in my bedroom watching TV relaxing after a long day at work when a mouse runs along the edge of the wall into the kitchen. I don't know where it went from there all I know is that I was frozen stiff. I could not move and when I did I curled up against the head board of my bed and called my then BF (not to be confused with the current BF). The then BF was kind enough to leave work early go to the store get some traps and set them and would come over when ever I heard the SNAP to dispose of the mouse. That's right my fear is so bad that I don't even like dead mice.
True Story #3....I am in my 30s. Its is Halloween night. A few weeks earlier I had found a stray cat (Tigger) that was so cute she is now a part of my family. I am seating in the living room watching TV eyeballing the giant bowl of candy I have for trick or treators. When I see Tigger runs past the candy bowl and into the laundry room. At the time I thought she stole some candy and I went after her to get the candy when I found her she was digging under her bed so I lifted it up and out ran a mouse. I then screamed and ran out of the house. That's where I was stilling standing when my parents got there.
True Story #4... I am now 35 when my mother sends me a text saying she has a mouse in her apartment!!!
- Mom: There is a mouse in our apartment.
- Me: I'm nvr coming bck over
- Mom: We have put out some bait bar. this time tomorrow it will be toast
- Me: Cll the management...its their job 2 take care of it
- Mom: Oh I'm going to let them know. but I'm not going to go to bed with out putting something tonight
- Me: I'm not coming over w/out photo proof that the f***er is dead.
- Mom: Michael I doubt that I will be able to get a picture of its dead body.
- Me: Then I'm not visiting you anymore!!!!!! I'm sorry I love u but it's a mouse.
- Mom: I love you too. And I promise that if you come over I will save you from the big bad mouse
- Me: I'M NOT COMING OVER TILL I HAVE PROOF IT'S DEAD...PERIOD
- Mom: Ok here is what we will do. If we don't see it for a week then that will mean that it is gone. Ok?
- Me: That might work
- Mom: I promise I will keep looking for it. We have put out the bait bar every where it is save.
- Me: I'm not sure I'll ever b able 2 come over
- Mom: Michael, when they eat the bait bar it makes them run for water. They run outside for water
- Me: There is h2o inside
- Mom: They run outside for water. sometimes they might die inside but most times they make it outside
- Me: Yuk
- Mom: Yea well the point is they die. hopefully outside
- Me: But with no/proof
- Mom: Like I said if we don't see it for a week then its gone. Its a pretty brave little thing.
- Me: Don't compliment the evil mouse
- Mom: Oooohhhh sorry I didn't mean to do that.
- Me: Damn straight now I'm doubting ur trying to kill the mouse.
- Mom: Oh I am, I "DO NOT" want a mouse in my home.
