When I Am Old(er)

My Grandma Carol has this poem in her house all about when I am old and all the naughty things I will do...this poem got me thinking lately of all the things I would do when I am older. Then I wondered what other people would also do. I mean I cant be the only person in the world who fantasies about the days when you no longer have to be responsible...turns out I am not.

Here are some of the answers

• Take out a loan on a sports car then default and drive it around hiding it from the repo man.
• Move to a nudist colony.
• Wear a tiara and and pink tutu every day.
• Pinch the bums of young men.
• Drink a bottle of wine everyday.
• Start smoking cigarettes and maybe more interesting things.
• Say the "f" word a lot.
• Watch rated R movies full of sex scenes.
• Eat cake for breakfast every day.
• Have a three way with George Clooney and Ryan Reynolds.
• I will always be responsible, its who I am.

Okay not everyone has an adventurous spirit but some of the answers were shocking.

What are you going to do when you are old?

Warning
by Jenny Joseph

WHEN I AM AN OLD WOMAN I SHALL WEAR PURPLE
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.