Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Here's Your Hand Gesture

I am not sure if the over abundance of sunny weather has made us all stupid or if the glare off our sun glasses is blinding us but I feel like I am being stalked by a plethora (have I ever mentioned how much I love the words plethora...its so fun to say plethora plethora plethora) of bad drivers lately.

I would like to send a message to some of the drivers to help them be better drivers.

  • To the guy driving the 4 ton truck: Just because you are in a truck that looks like it could eat my car does not mean you automatically have the right of way. This morning I clearly had the right away but you attempt to run over my car like in some monster truck rally was annoying to me. And put me off my coffee which my coworkers are not happy about. I am not sure if you need a big truck like that with its diesel engine but I am guessing by the way you flipped some hand gestures at me that you are compensating for a lack of something.
  • To the guy driving the yellow corvette: 1. Yellow is a girl color. Did you borrow the car from your girlfriend? 2. A Corvette? Really? Are they still cool? I seriously doubt it but lets say they are...3. Is it necessary to drive that fast? Is getting there 10 minutes early really going to matter? Especially when one day you are going to get a ticket and be really late and/or cause an accident in which case you may not make it at all.
  • To the woman in the economy car:  I get that some mornings are better than others. Some mornings are just plain ass hard. I personally hate getting out of bed. And I am not a fan of appearing in public without at least basic makeup but when you are running later it is NEVER a good idea to apply mascara WHILE DRIVING. You are the reason women drivers have bad reps. Either take the 30 seconds at home to apply the mascara or wait and do it in the parking lot of where ever you are going.
  • To the speeding jerk who flipped me off for driving to slow even though I was 7 miles over the speed limit: You are lucky I promised my mom I would stop flipping people off while driving. You made it very hard to keep my promise but I did. I did spew a plethora of profanity at you and mentally wished for you to get a very large speeding ticket...it may not have happened today but it will because I always get my way.
I hope everyone has a great day and drives safely!!!!

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