What makes you feel valued at home? At work? Life in general? Is it important to you to have others notice your worth? That seems a lot to tackle with one blog post and I am not going to tackle a lot of it. I am going to talk about a friend of mine that I believe has value but is not feeling it right now.
First I have to say that this person and I do not always see eye to eye. In fact we have been known to butt heads and not speak to each other. This is not always ideal since we see each other a lot but at least we are always polite when we we are disagreeing.
I am not going to mention her name but I want her to know that I see her and value what she does in my life and the life's of others. She is probably the most compassionate person I know and always has room in her life for people. She offers her help often and was generous enough to offer help to anyone who needs it.
Her heart is as big as the state of Alaska and often lets people in even though she knows she may get hurt. I am personally amazed by this ability, I often keep people out and at arms length to avoid any messy emotions that may smear my mascara. She is okay with it. I once heard her say what if I am the only person that helps them.
The thing that she does very well is make sure to tell others that they are valued. She can find the littlest thing focus on it and help others to see the good in the situation.
I feel like we have moved away from this practice. Some how we have got the perception that telling people their value will diminish our own value. My friend knows the truth it doesn't take away from you...it has nothing to do with you. Telling a person that they value or a kind gesture to say thanks will not effect you in anyway. It may even make you feel good about your day.
I am struggling with how to help my friend feel that value and to be honest there is nothing I can do in this situation. Which is not an easy thing for me after all I am a fixer and fixing is what I do. I am going to ask who are the people in your life that you value?
Have you told them recently I value you and all that you do?
What have you done to express your appreciation without words?
Are you good at telling people or bad?
Have you told you significant other? Family? Co-workers? The checker at the local megastore?
I hope my friend feels valued again soon.